Friday, March 29, 2013

Here's what I learned at College

While reading this, it's important to understand that I for sure learned a substantial amount of textbooky information while I was in college. I'm somewhat afraid that this will come across differently than I intend, so let me get this out of the way first: I am unbelievably grateful that I was able to pursue an education at a University and feel very lucky for that opportunity. I'm quite glad that I did not choose to drop out any of the several (dozen) times that I threatened to and the last 4.3 years were of great use for my personal and educational growth.

I'm just kidding. Everyone who knows me knows that bedtime in college was 9 o'clock. If I was living dangerously, 9:30.

So yes, I learned and was taught over 46 months of sitting in a classroom, counting the days (~1380) until I'd be done. What I seem to have overlooked while I was either A) angry I was in class or B) tired while I was in class or C) [not] texting in class, was the fact that school sneak-attacked me and there was NOTHING that I could do about it. No matter how many homework assignments that I skipped or textbooks I chose to skim read in those roughly 496,800 minutes that I was in school, I still left college thinking that I had greatly improved upon my life. I left with a plethora of skills and new understandings. Although these were not entirely what the school system wanted me to learn, I graduated from WWU with a whole array of new skills in my back pocket. Because you cannot access your front pocket while wearing a cap and gown. Here's my list of the most important things that I learned while at college:

1)  It took me until the last quarter of my last year of school to learn something that I have no doubts will be carried with me for the rest of my life. You see, I had always done a simple task wrong and suffered horribly for it. Never do you feel like more of a failure than when you get eggshells into your meal when you crack the egg. Never do you feel like more of a disgrace when you go to crack the egg and it goes all over your hands. Never do you feel more shame than when you go to crack the egg and swing too hard and end up breaking it all over your counter.

I was like you. A broken-eggshelled hooligan. Ruining my scrambled eggs one too many shells at a time. I knew something must change or else I'd be an egg-failure the rest of my life! Enter Benjamin V Rathkamp, a new roommate into the household. You see, Ben knows a thing or two about eggs. In fact, he specializes in eggs, fruit plates, and Call of Duty. Ben is responsible for teaching me how to crack eggs one-handed. Now I can crack eggs one-handed, dual-handed, right or left handed, into the pan, into a bowl, impress my friends, behind my back, Benihannas style. No longer do I crush the eggshells with my gorilla arms (in hair, not strength). No longer do I Randy Johnson the egg into the pan, exploding the shell into one million pieces.


2) I've already touched on this here but I'm going to play with it again because it is a lesson that I've learned in life that essentially boosts my street cred and street smarts to a level far above non-college graduated folk. One of the most useful things that I learned tromping around the campus at university was how to navigate crowded spaces. You are faced with many tasks while in college, the strongest of those being getting to the bus on time. Leaving classes for the day was always the hardest task that I would encounter at school :) :) :) :) :) :) :)

3) I've grown while at college. Actually technically I've shrunk because I stayed the same height and was fat in 2008. So I guess at college I learned how to be skinnier. This seems to make sense, because the third thing that I learned while at school was the absolute deliciousness of asparagus and brussel sprouts. Turns out that these things are the complete opposite of the heinous thoughts that I had about them prior to becoming an adult at college. I mean, I became obsessed with vegetables while at college, but the rest of 'em I liked enough already. I HATED asparagus and brussel sprouts, but now I want them. Right now.


If that doesn't look like a party I don't know what does.

4)  While at college I crammed in roughly 12 years of driving experience into the four and bit years that I was there. Sorry world, but my rough calculations have me at driving ~47,000 miles during college. Not counting trips to bike races. I won't talk more here, since I talk about driving a lot on this blog. The number four thing that I learned at college was how to be a better driver.

5)  Holy shit I love coffee. Thanks college/bike racing.

6)  As I'm writing this, I keep thinking of things that I learned while being a student. Which is a good thing, right? College is about bettering yourself, and I definitely got that out of my education. I really don't see myself using my degree at any point in the near future, and I have come to peace with the fact that that is fine. The hardest part of college for me was feeling like it was useless. I want to bike race, and I want to do that now. I saw no point in learning about stuff that did not apply. As I grew, college became less of a mission that I was forcing myself on to get a degree, and more of an opportunity to better myself as a whole. Don't get me wrong, there were moments last quarter that I thought about how useless the things I was studying were, but it was less holistic. I finally started to see that the important part of college wasn't the piece of paper at the end, but the way that you got yourself to that piece of paper. And as I wrote that I realized the BS behind that too, because really, I'll be extremely glad to have that paper in 10 years when I go to get a job. But college for me wasn't about what I learned in classes and textbooks, but how I grew as a person. That's why the number six thing that I learned while at college is.... that it's important to have nice shoes.

That's right. I'm done being all sentimental and educational. The most beneficial and elaborate thing that I learned while being a student is that tennis shoes do not cut it for all occasions. I went from being a one pair of shoes guy at the beginning of college to a ten pair of shoes guy at the end of college. Once you start getting shoes for occasions, you can never stop.

From eggs to wingtip oxfords, I've grown because of college. So thanks, dude.

San Dimas Stage Race

The first bigger race of the season tends to be a shock to the system. The speed, field size and aggression are a direct contrast to the long base miles and solo tromps that bike racers grow accustomed to during the off season. Luckily, I had tried to prepare specifically for this moment by spending many-a-moments riding the rollers in my garage while watching The Walking Dead. If you are confused by that: my rollers have very little resistance so I spin 'em fast and The Walking Dead trains the mind on how to handle aggressive situations. I was not the only one to prepare for San Dimas in alternative ways. In fact, Jon Hornbeck was trying to make a statement. You see, he normally drives around in a small and white Honda Civic. To demonstrate his change in mood and mental preparation for the San Dimas Stage Race, he showed up to the TT start driving this beast:


It worked. Jon rode a brisk uphill TT so I immediately bought a cement truck to drive around. In this sport, it's all about preparation. I'm trying to avoid a strict "the course is like this, I got this place, and I wish I got this place" race report. However, one of the things that makes SDSR so difficult as a kick-off for the season is the courses that we get to pedal around on. The TT is 4.25 miles and all uphill. I do not really want you to think I'm a liar, so I'll specify that there is actually about 500 meters of flat at the very beginning of the course. I argue that this is the hardest part because the deepest ventricles and valves of your heart desire nothing more than to crush that first minute out of the start house. Go ahead, I dare you. Then blow up in spectacular 4th of July fashion three and a half switchbacks into the climb. We all rode hard, were jubilant about our Reynolds wheels and Bell Javelin helmets, and finished with results that, I think, we were generally OK with. That's the beautiful thing about any shorter time trial- it's really easy to look back at it in the parking lot and imagine yourself going minutes faster. We were all looking for a bit of extra strength leading into the road race, so Doug (super mechanic) took care of that for us.


Friday night was stressful. Staz, Heeley Swag, Lil' Steve and myself sat around a kitchen table and did something that I'm still not sure I understand. We played Settlers of Catan, a board game with the main goals being to confuse you, to instigate fierce discussions over the merits of rocks and grain, and finally disappoint you completely when you lose the longest road card. In one night we turned from normal humans into, well, less-normal humans. I feasted on Greek yogurt and schemed for the next day's road race. More course description. The road/circuit/loop is seven miles of terrible roads. We do 12 laps. It has two climbs a lap and since it takes place in a public park, it also has many road gates, kiosks, swingsets and hot dog venders to avoid. I have done this race once in the past, and what I remembered mostly was that it was difficult pretty much the entire day. I decided that in order to succeed, I'd need to channel a different power animal than I normally would. For those of you who've never read my stories before, it's fairly beneficial to your success in pedaling to have some sort of creature that rides on your shoulders. Even if it does nothing for you, I've found that animal-embodiment helps in the general intimidation sense. This course is too hard for me to carry around a gorilla on my back, so I had to go lighter and trickier. In a perfect sequence of events, Friday night Doug found this creature in the garage:


Normally, I'd laugh at anyone that chose a moth as a power animal. For the San Dimas Road Race, there is no better creature to have. Moths are great at blending in. Moths are quick, moths are fighters, and moths weigh hardly nothing. This was a good combination for the road race. I'd say it was a winning combination, but since I did not win, that would be falsifying a testimonial. Which is not chill.
As predicted, the race was very difficult. Bissell made it clear from lap one that they did not want a break to get a significant gap. That means they rode the front hard from very early on. The combination of that, plus the climbs and the wind made for a very long 3 hour race. After Gaimon (Bissell) crashed, the race was calm for a lap. This made the remaining couple of laps extra-brisk. Chris Stastny kept me in great position for the third-to-last and second-to-last climbs, and I crested in the front 20 comfortably. Then on the last lap people went really fast on the final climb, and my moth like behavior wished that the moth at least had a gorilla tattoo on its wing for a little extra gusto. I came off the group and rolled in 15 seconds down.
The crashes and pace of the road race cut our field in half, and Sunday's crit was a small field. I knew that a break was going to go, it was going to go early, and it was going to be gone for most of the day. I figured Jamis HB (leaders, strongest team in the race) would want a break of people out of GC contention to be up the road picking up the time bonuses and neutralizing attacks from the field. I wanted to be in this break for three reasons:
  1. Press for the team
  2. I was hoping for a $20,000 crowd prime
  3. Best case scenario, group laps the field.
Curious of my crit power animal?


So when a break of three or four went on the second lap, I wanted in. They definitely were not waiting around, so I did the worst tactical attack from 25th wheel I think I've ever done. Inexplicably, no one followed my attack and I bridged up to the group alone. For the next 55ish minutes, we were getting time gaps anywhere from 15 to 35 seconds. Soon, some GC riders bridged up, started attacking, and the break split. Then, to no one's surprise, Jamis HB brought the break back in plenty of time for JJ Haedo to hit the watt bag and do winning.
Just like that SDSR was done. As a team, we were not fully content with how we rode, but there were some good moments mixed in as well. That first bigger race of the season is always shocking, but with great support from our sponsors and staff, all we as riders had to worry about was the pedaling. I'm confident that we will be swinging pretty hard over the next couple of races and I'm excited to throw down with the guys. And finally win a game of Settlers of Catan.

We're getting ready for The Redlands Bicycle Classic now. Stay tuned for more reports, and if you all are lucky, more videos of Doug exercising.

Thursday, March 21, 2013

Migration

Imagine if birds started to migrate in March. Silly geese.

Exactly one week ago today I put things into a backpack and went to the library at school. There, I chose a topic, did 10 sources of research worth of research, and wrote a ten page essay. In three hours. Then I went home, started packing my bedroom, and filled a carry-on bag with checked bag equivalent amount of stuff.

Thursday I went to school for the last time ever, turned in my ish, and then went home and packed some more.

Friday I flew to California.

Saturday I rode six hours with the HB boys and then ate a delicious cookie thanks to Winger's girlfriend.

Sunday I rode bikes in Santa Rosa, then Danny and I walked to a coffee shop. I bought a $1.70 drip, and Danny bought a $5.75 Caramel Dignity-stealing Machiatto. However, as he went to pay, the barista goes "OMG I like totally forgot that there is a special regarding that exact drink in that exact size today". She presses some buttons, and then all of a sudden Danny's drink was free. Then Danny was all smug for the rest of the day, so I made sure to steal his leg warmer so he is stuck with only one for the rest of the season.

Monday I woke up to ride at 7am because we also had to drive Santa Rosa-Hermosa Beach. Turns out it is still dark at 7, so I rode at 7:15. Then Doug, Alan, Danny and I drove for nine hours, I ate an entire bag of snap peas and Alan did business deals on his Ipadphone. Doug actually drove the whole time.

After we dropped Alan off in an alleyway in Venice Beach (sketchy, I know), he took off running in a different direction. Who knows what he has been doing, but we are all hopeful that it involves Muscle Beach and henna tattoos. Meanwhile, Doug and I crashed at the Heeley's house for the couple of days in between camp and San Dimas.

For those of you who remember, Danny's house is chill and his family is chiller. So Doug and I are very content to have had a relaxing couple of days living the beach lifestyle. In fact, Doug was SO relaxed he decided to go on a bike pedal. His bike pedal was longer than Danny's, and maybe faster. Proof!


As part of Doug and Ian's fabulous adventure, we stayed in a love-shack cabana across the street from the Heeley's household. Inside of this magic, we were blessed by a brave guardian that watched over us while we slept.


This is potentially terrifying.


Tela, Giddeon, Doug and I went out to dinner on some night. I'd love to tell you what night it was, but since now I am on summer break for the rest of my life, every day is Ianday. Even today. So on Ianday we went to a Peruvian restaurant where it became clear that everything served in Peru is green.



Tela and I heard that authentic Peruvian cuisine is served with french fries. When we went to Ecuador, there were delicious french fries served on the side of pretty much every meal. Turns out in Peru they don't roll that way. BAM, throw those in the meal!


Now I have a tremendously sad story. Tela and Giddeon wanted to do something fun on Ianday night. They suggested going to a driving range to smash the living s**t out of some golf balls. Now, don't get me wrong, I'd love to pummel some thangs, but I've got the whole bike racing thing to worry about. Everyone knows that golf clubs are heavy, so I was worried about the safety of my back and truthfully, other people.

Instead, we decided on go-karting. Suuuure, way safer than golfing. I was worried for my safety, so I made sure to drive defensively and use my turn signals at all times. I was terrible and it was one of the top 3 saddest moments of my last 12 months. Number two was when I finished all remaining episodes of The League and number one was when I mis-made my Aeropress coffee this morning. The good news is that I gave Danny the broken dirty coffee and made another one.



No one research my lap times.

Now we're settled in to our host housing at San Dimas. I heard it was snowing in Seattle. Sorry.


Saturday, March 9, 2013

Here's something that I enjoy


I took a class in highschool called "Cinematic Visions". So basically I'm an expert on what I'm about to talk about.

I've got a skill that I feel very comfortable bragging about. I am VERY good at watching movies and television. Sup. I mean, I can just sit down and watch something- no planning or special steps taken or waivers filled out. There are lots of things that I love about movies and TV: their ability to transport you to a foreign or exciting land, the opportunity to place yourself into a life that you may never have the chance to live, the gift of humor and entertainment, and perhaps 1.7 million other reasons.

I like all of those 1.7 million reasons (except the scare yourself silly one), but there is one aspect of film and television that I feel comfortable saying is my favorite. That ladies and gentlemen, is when you see an actor or an actress with a very recognizable role for one style of character play something completely opposite of their popular depiction. There are lots of these extraordinarily special moments, and I've been noticing as I become older, more mature, and less busy with activities such as "school", I also proportionately become more aware of these gems. Let's stop stalling and dive into my favorite film and television juxtapositions:


This is Ryan from The Office. For those of you unfamiliar, Ryan is the cool, baller, suave, young, hip, better-than everyone... intern. Who eventually becomes the boss, but gets fired because he spent time being awesome.  I do not want to explain every show and character to you, but Ryan is a cocky hombro.

Now let me introduce you to Pfc. Smithson Utivich.


Smithson is part of an elite group of "Nazi Killers" in the movie Inglorious Basterds. I do not know how to be more specific than what I just set. He goes around killing Nazi's, as part of an elite group, whose job is to kill Nazis. Better?

Next, America has been captivated by a TV show about many different families. The arguable star of the show is an actor by the name of Ty Burrell.


Phil Dunphy is the loveable loser on the show Modern Family. He's unaware, tries very hard to be young and hip, and used to be a cheerleader. He exercises with those elliptical macine bike things and is usually the cause of the laughs on the show.

But BAM, here I was, watching Black Hawk Down, a haunting true story about a group of US soldiers trapped in hostile Somalia. Try and take that terrible situation and extrememly realistic/violent film seriously when Phil Dunphy is next to Josh Hartnett manning an AK-47. It's difficult.


Next, let's look at the goofy fat guy. Hey-o! Randy from My Name Is Earl. The bumbling idiotic brother of the show's main character.


But have you spent any great amount of time with the movie American History X, and met Ethan Suplee's character Seth? The evil neo-nazi who poorly influences an impressionable child?


Ahh, community college. Or, Community, a show that at least for a couple of seasons used to be funny. There are many shining stars on the cast, but Danny Pudi is my favorite. He plays Abed, a boy trapped in an adult's body who loves games, pretend, and acting like Batman (different than pretend).


But, like any good actor, you have to start (or end) your career somewhere. And Danny Pudi took a road trip and saw bewbz and got drunk.


When an actor has been famous for basically their whole life, their defining roles may differ to the viewer. To some, Rob Lowe may be famous for his Brat Pack days. For others (at least me), his career has become LITERALLY notorious for his portrayal of Chris Traeger on Parks and Recreation. Chris is an athletically-obsessed health freak, who takes great enjoyment in LITERALLY everything he does. He also says LITERALLY alot. LITERALLY every scene he is in.


I'm sure there are lots of films that Rob Lowe has been in that contrast this. But I haven't seen them. However, recently I watched some movie on the Lifetime channel. Awkward, I know. I watched Prosecuting Casey Anthony, a made for TV movie focusing on that very well-known trial. Rob Lowe played the prosecuting attorney, Jeff Ashton. He didn't say literally once and I was SO confused. Also, the defense attorney in this same movie was played by Oscar from The Office. That's right, the quiet, never-stand-up-for-himself Oscar played the role of the attorney who got Casey Anthony away with murder.


There was a reason I went in this order. I love making full circles. As you can see, I went from The Office, to Community, to Parks and Rec, to Casey Anthony, to The Office. I'd like to take this time to quote a great poet:

The shit I'm doing this year? Insanity.
Made the beat then murdered it, Casey Anthony
-Childish Gambino

Let's close this circle. Childish Gambino is the rap pseudonym of Donald Glover, who plays Troy on NBC's Community. Donald Glover writes for 30 Rock, which stars Tina Fey, who was on SNL with Amy Poehler, who plays Leslie Knope from Parks and Recreation. So when Childish Gambino raps about Casey Anthony, who was the subject of a movie acted in by Rob Lowe, it brings us back to Parks and Recreation again. If you look closely at the photo of Chris Traeger, you see a man jumping in the background.

That man's name is Andy Dwyer.


AND THAT MAN KILLED OSAMA BIN LADEN!


That's right folks. Andy Dwyer was the man in Zero Dark Thirty. I'm sure all the people who do not think OBL is dead jumped aboard this train to try and disprove the gov'ment, because let's be honest. How could OBL be dead if it was up to Andy Dwyer?


I know there are more. Please share.

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

I seem to have forgotten about February

Did it happen? If I didn't post, I'm led to believe that it never existed. And if it never existed, then that's probably fine because February is quite possibly the most boring month of the year. Besides August. November is fairly lame also.

Talking seriously, hunger and war are large problems in this world. Talking less seriously, I've been kept occupied by some of my commitments. These include, but are not limited to:
  • Training. 5000 KJs a day. It's not too hard to get in if you just try to do 600 watts for a couple hours. No biggy.
  • Schooling. I go. Sometimes.
  • New employment! I've realized that it's awfully stressful to worry if your card is going to be declined while getting groceries on a racing trip. To lessen that stress a little bit, I went seeking a job that would offer me monies in exchange for work. Success! I'm the new "Social Media Coordinator" of the Marymoor Velodrome. What this means is I check Facebook and Twitter more often now. I also try and think about not coasting, turning left, and sitting around waiting to race again. I've been doing lots of writing for the MVA and my stories will be posted on the website throughout the season. If there is anything especially juicy that you all NEED to know about, I'll maybe post it here too.
  • Moving- COLLEGE IS ALMOST DONE. This means I leave Bellingham because it is far away from everything. Since the #swaggerwagon is no longer functional, I do not have a car that can store all of my things anymore. That's right world, I am a housetrucker no longer. This means that I've been making trips down to Momma's house with my things. It turns out that I do not have many possessions that belong indoors. However, the carload that I took of bike-goods was overflowing. Anyone need any frames or wheelsets? 4SALE4CHEAP
  • TV and Videogames- I am so busy that I don't have time for fun and relaxing activities such as these. JK. After the above mentioned 5000kj days, sometimes essays do not write themselves as they often do when you're asleep and dreaming. When you have an essay to write but are quite fatigued from slinging wattz all day, homework does not get accomplished. Instead, I watched 21 episodes of The Walking Dead in 8 days. This was a terrible stretch for me where I was super recovered from training, really happy with life, and really unmotivated to do anything else but ride, watch Walking Dead, and eat purple cabbage.
  •  Speaking of purple cabbage, it's delicious.
  • New bikes! Swag swag swag. The product is starting to come in and over the non-existent February I got both of my Jamis bikes. These things are sweet, and I spent some time getting them dialed in before the race season kicked off last weekend. The big news is that after an almost two hour long bike fit on my TT bike from the guys at HSP, I was comfortable in aero position for the first time ever. 

Really new and really scary

Getting fit at HSP

Doug making some cut-twice measure once decisions. Wait, what?
Ok, so transitioned from bikes to life to school to food and then back to bikes. Perfect.

RACING!

Last SaturSunday I got to pedal bikes in competition, which is fun. The weekend consisted of my normal season start: Icebreaker TT on Saturday and Mason Lake road race on Sunday. For those of you who either A: know me well B: have a great memory or C: stalk my year old blog posts (http://craneimal.blogspot.com/2012/03/consistency-breeds-success-right.html), you'll know that I have a bit of a curse with the IceMason double. If you didn't fit into any of those above options, I ask you, why not?

Let's start with the tremendous news first. I am NO LONGER CURSED! That's right folks, I broke the 3rd 3rd disease. I'm not sure it was a fair trade, I moved up in the TT and heavily lost in the road race. Like, 40th or something. But I still beat Lang.

The good news is that the sensations were pleasant and I have not forgotten how to pedal hard while being weighed down by a couple of safety pins. Let's start with the TT.

Again, let me stress that I've never felt comfortable in aero bars before. My old TT bike was too small, with non-adjustable bars. So I just dealt with it. My arms, shoulders, and back would beg me to get out of the aero bars approximately 2.5 minutes into a time trial. Not awesome. This 20 minute TT on my new Jamis Xenith T2 went by so fast because I was not spending the whole time thinking about how much my shoulders hurt. Instead, I got to focus on making my legs hurt MORE.


Unfortunately, Colby (my teammate) managed to make himself hurt just a teeny bit more, beating me for the win by one second. This is ok though, because he is my teammate. Let's chat about Colby for only a second, because that's how much he beat me by. He is from Vancouver (the one that's not in Canada) which means many things. I'm going to ignore them all, and instead focus on how he suffers from Svein Tuft syndrome. This means that Colby has the largest rib cage ever. His torso is like a keg (of rootbeer, he's not 21), or even a boxing bag. Medically, that is a sure sign that his lungs are approximately 14 times the size of the average human, and 8 times the size of the lung of an ox. It's the sure sign of TT greatness, I mean, look at Svein. Colby is undefeated this year in TT's, and it will be exciting to see what he can do on the National level. In order to make that only be a second, you have to read it really, really, infomercial fast.

Moving on to Sunday, I drove to the race with Lang and Rhae. Meanwhile, Colin passed us on the freeway going much too fast. He did not get a ticket, and instead this was an extreme foreshadowing of what would come in the closing kilometers of the bike pedaling contest.

In the bicycle race, I decided that riding in the peleton is for sissies. Luckily, it seemed that other people also had that idea. In an incredible sequence of events, the first attack in the first kilometer of the first road race of the year led to the first breakaway of the season.

About one minute and thirty seconds in the race, I pulled through after a Brian Hitchcock attack and saw that it was just him, myself, and Logan Owen with a gap on the field. Since we're all apparently interested in causing ourselves great amount of pain, we all agreed that we were committed and were looking at a long, 72 mile day off the front. Normally this does not seem like a smart game plan- Three verses the world. Kind of like how there are three people who like those Kombucha drinks with the floating chia seeds in the world, but they are so motivated and so down with the seed-filled jelly that they keep the company in business. Get it? I'm saying that our breakaway was similar to a drink that not many people like but is kept in stock because of the desires of those three people. Ok, it makes sense, seriously. Just trust me. Where I was going with that was : Basically, if I had to choose two people to go off the front all day with, Hitch and Logan fit that role nicely.

One hour later, we got caught, which was sad, but I think that the photographer in the trunk of the lead car was getting bored of just seeing us .

Look! Proof + sun!






We got caught, the word from some people in the group was that it was apparently due in part to a spirited chase from Oregon (the whole State) and some other odd chasing that brought the group closer to us up the road.

Counter-productive?
Then, I let myself chill in the peleton. For about 30 seconds before both Hitch and I were in the next move. However, Mason Lake Uno made people really excited, so everyone pedaled hard and made sure it was a bunch sprint. I spent the remainder of the day riding the front and attacking, seemingly forgetting about #tactics and instead focusing on making myself incredibly f**ked the next day (funked* of course).


Then, I forgot that I had pedaled too hard for too long. I had this moment where every bone and orifice of my body said "attack! And then let's stop for burritos!" so I listened to it. However, this message from deep inside me came out at about the three k to go point, which anyone who watches bike racing on TV knows never works. So I attacked, and as I was settling into pedaling hard for the rest of the race mode, I realized that there was some strange feeling of discomfort in the lower half of my body and some fascinating urge to pull over and take a nap. This turned my 3k to go winning attack into basically a reallllly drawn out lead out for everyone else. Colin, trying to redefine what exactly it means when you use the hashtag #colinmove, countered me at about 1.5 k to go, going around 14mph faster than I was going. My brain told me that I should follow that move, because it was a good'un, but the whole rest of my body went into revolt at that idea. I stood up to accelerate, but instead lost about one minute in the last K. Yay Colin!

So instead of 3rd and 3rd I got 2nd and maybe 42nd. More importantly, the legs got turning and I was able to take off my vest and ride with a jersey. Summer in Shelton.

Bike racing is the bees knees.